Friday, September 4, 2015

Dear Cheat-Day Me

Okay, listen up and pay attention! I know it's exciting to have a day to ignore calorie counting and just eat whatever but, please, please for the love of all that is holy, stop stuffing your face with so much crap that you make us sick!

Is it really worth eating all that only to end up spending hours trying not to throw up and running back and forth to the bathroom? Is feeling that horribly sick a good reaction to being able to throw caution to the wind?

And while we're on that topic, is eating so much of that crap really a good idea? I mean, yeah, it's fun picking something you wouldn't normally eat and just being able to enjoy it, but do you have to enjoy three or four of them? And then piles of other stuff on top of that??

You don't have to shovel down food like you'll never see it again! There's no famine coming. No one is threatening to take the food away from you. The cupboards will not be bare tomorrow... calm down, slow down and stop gorging yourself! I understand why you're doing this but stop it already! And on top of that, it's not like that food is going to be denied to you until the next cheat day. Hell, if you want an ice cream come that badly just work it into your calories during the week!

I know that you and I are part of this body that has issues with food. I know there's binging issues and withholding issues and stomach issues and all sorts of crap but please stop (or at least slow down), you're making the rest of us seriously sick and we don't like it!

I think it's time we take this whole thing and talk to the therapist about it. After all, that's what she's there for and this really needs to be dealt with, but in the meantime, calm down! This food will be here tomorrow and the day after as well. You don't have to shove it in in one day just because it holds the title "cheat" day. It's okay... you're not going to be starved... I promise!

And just as a heads up, don't freak out, but "cheat day" is about to become a "cheat meal." It'll be much better if we pick a food or a meal and eat it slowly, savoring it, enjoying every bite instead of shoving all sorts of crud down, barely even being able to taste it just because we can!

So anyway, please, calm down. Because you're making us seriously sick and we're done with it!

Thank you.
Regular -Day Me

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