Saturday, August 6, 2016

I'm Entitled to Change My Mind at Any Time...

Okay, here we go and, yes, I know I go back and forth a lot but this is the only way I'll figure out what I need to do.

Actually, I already know what I need to do. I just need to actually stick with it and do it!

So for the last few weeks I've done a lot of binging, some calorie counting and only a couple days of low carb and I hate the way I'm feeling.

I'm exhausted, I have no energy to work out, my head hurts, my stomach hurts, my body and head feel heavy and I'm just not with it and my mood is dropping pretty badly.

Now, of course not all of that is from eating carbs but I don't think they help me. I miss how I felt when I was actually doing well with low carb. I go back in my blog and read posts where I feel great and full of energy. Where my headaches went away, my stomach felt good, there was almost no bloating and so on and on and on.

I miss that and I want to feel it again. I do feel burnt out on low carb but I feel burnt out from how I was doing it... the unhealthy way. Sure in the last two days I had a little spaghetti and a little bread and, yes, it was delicious but it didn't make me feel good. It didn't give me energy. It didn't do what protein does.

And, for me, the most important things that low carb helped with... I rarely binged. Like I've written before, it's like low carb turned the binging switch off in my head and the last two weeks it's been turned back on and the more I do it the worse it gets. Just the last two days of calorie counting and eating a high amount of carbs, all I can think about it downing a pint of ice cream and anything else I can find. Low carb helped me with that so why am I turning away from it?

I have several posts that I keep reading rereading. This one HERE  is six weeks into low carb where I talk about food, how I'm feeling and how much low carb has helped against junk and binging.

In this one HERE (just a few days after the previous one) I talk about how I'm doing low carb step by step and how it's working for me.

In this ONE I talk about needing some support with sticking to low carb and I got tons of help and advice from my friends with an update HERE.

And in this ONE I talk about why I'm going back to low carb just like I am now.

Those are the blog posts that make me want all of those feelings back. The control that I had, the energy, the weight and inch loss, I want it all and I know how to get it so why am I trying something else?

I don't want to experiment anymore. I just want to go back to what I know works and make me feels good so that's what I'm doing.

I'm still working on the healthy, homemade food part, it's just going to be low carb food. Tomorrow will be day 1 and this coming Thursday will be week 1 again (like it has been for the last few weeks).

I may be burnt out on low carb right now but I think it's because I keep eating the same stuff over and over again and I'm pretty sure that when I expand my recipe and food options that I will feel much better about it!

I know what makes me feel the best and I refuse to sabotage myself yet again. And now I know what I need to do to stick with what works... I need to reread my blog posts, think about how I felt and then suck it up and keep going. Not even homemade bread is worth how I'm feeling!

Let's do this thing!

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